I think the euphoria of finding a job and signing a lease for an apartment has begun to wane. Instead of giddy, I feel downtrodden. Perhaps it's the full weight of last weekend's events hitting me.
It is strange to think that for about two years I had a phone call to look forward to every night and that time is now over. I do not regret the time spent getting to know such a wonderful young man, but the breaking up part hurts like (excuse my French) hell. Reminders are constantly around me, I cannot escape them. It's spring and everybody's in love. Everybody except me. And am I crying? No.
What is wrong with me? Why can I not cry? What is the disconnect between my heart and my tear ducts? Am I still numb? Will it hit me head-on in a couple weeks?
Sometimes I think I'm too good at coping
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1 comments:
Not everyone is in love. I'm not. I'm praying for you Calli.
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